“Remember that following desire promises the attainment of that of which you are desirous; and aversion promises the avoiding that to which you are averse. However, he who fails to obtain the object of his desire is disappointed, and he who incurs the object of his aversion wretched. If, then, you confine your aversion to those objects only which are contrary to the natural use of your faculties, which you have in your own control, you will never incur anything to which you are averse. But if you are averse to sickness, or death, or poverty, you will be wretched.” Epictetus’ Enchiridion
Chasing, grasping, desiring. All actions of an untrained mind that I should avoid to be happy. Chasing would be great if there was an end…there isn’t. You will keep chasing once you get to what you thought was your ending. This is not to say you shouldn’t have goals, simply that you should not define your happiness by them. Happiness begins in the present moment. Happiness first…goals later. Grasping never works. Clinging to those things which you think will last forever is simply a lie. A great big lie to yourself. My wife sits with me tonight, how wonderful! I will enjoy this wonderful woman in this moment, and every one that I am given with her. To think we shall grow older together for 40 more years is a risky bet; if it happens I shall be grateful. To assume that we shall be here together forever is a lie. To ignore the fact that we will be apart someday is a lie. Desiring that which I do not have creates want, a sense of depravity. In truth, I have all I need.
With reflection and meditation, I curb chasing, grasping, and desire…and I find virtue.